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You are Capable of Finding Joy After Abuse—Here’s How to Start

You are Capable of Finding Joy After Abuse—Here’s How to Start

Does past abuse ruin our chances of living a good life (let alone finding joy)? My vision of a “best life” was essentially being okay with waking up each day. No longer wanting to give up. Surviving. I didn’t think any more than that was possible. That sounded like the best I could have in life…and I’ve discovered many other survivors feel this way too. We guess we can get to an okay life—but don’t believe...

When to end a friendship and how to do it guilt free

When to End a Friendship (& How to Do It Guilt-Free)

Ever had a friendship that made you feel uncomfortable? Someone you stress about spending time with…but they aren’t actually abusive? How do you know when to end a friendship that’s unpleasant like this?  That’s the focus of this blog. I’ve talked lots about walking away from abusers in the past, but this situation is much more nuanced.  It’s about leaving someone who isn’t a bad or harmful person… we just don’t feel great in the friendship. Or...

The one key thing you need to control your emotions of regret

The One Key Thing You Need to Control Your Emotions of Regret

This might sound weird, but regret is a surprisingly helpful feeling. It helps us control emotions trauma brings up, preventing us from ending up in a crisis.  But…it definitely doesn’t feel pleasant, right? So how could it possibly be helpful? How can regret, an emotion that often speaks to us with self-hatred, be beneficial?  And yes, I am talking about that regret that tells you “You shouldn’t have dressed that way” or “you shouldn’t have dated him.”...

What is joy + how to fill your life with it after abuse

What is Joy? (+ How to Fill Your Life with it after Abuse)

What is joy? And more importantly, what the heck does it look like after abuse?  Is it something us survivors can even have (because, let’s face it, we face pain on the daily)? I’m a huge advocate of living a joyous life—and I fully believe, with every bone in my body, that you can live a life of joy. You can have the career and relationship you want, you can wake up feeling excited for the day,...

How to make every decision with self confidence

How to Make Every Decision with Self Confidence

You’ll have self confidence if you believe in the decisions you make.  Making decisions you believe in means trusting you followed your heart and did what was truly best for yourself. If you’re certain you did the best thing we possibly could at the time, then you’ll feel strong and self-loving even if something doesn’t work out.  That’s ideal—to trust ourselves every time we make a choice. Imagine being able to go on a date and know you...

The Direct Path You Need to Follow to Thrive after Abuse

We all enjoy dreaming of a better life. One where we thrive after abuse—less PTSD, stable finances, happier relationships. Whatever that dream is for you.  We have to dream to stay hopeful, but we often try to reach our ideal life without taking some important healing steps first. Without this foundation, even the best goals and opportunities will (most likely) collapse around us. Everyone healing from abuse has to go through the same (or at least an...

How to overcome feeling suicidal with one simple exercise

How to Overcome Feeling Suicidal with One Simple Exercise

Feeling suicidal after abuse is extremely common. In fact, trauma is statistically one of the top reasons people take their own life.  I wanted to address this in a realistic and honest blog. Because I too have felt suicidal (as have my alters)—and I’ve been able to make it through. My hope with this blog is to help you do the same. I know that this technique won’t work for everyone, but I do hope you give...

Design your destiny and purpose of life after abuse

Design Your Destiny and Purpose of Life After Abuse

“What do I want to make with my life?” is quite literally the most powerful question you can ask yourself. Why? Well, it gives you the chance to define your own unique purpose of life.  When you feel like there is a purpose to life—a reason that you exist in this world—you’ll feel ready to face each day. Even the days that are hard and tiring.  You won’t feel paralyzed by challenges. Obstacles will no longer seem...

Love life after abuse with these 3 simple steps

Life After Abuse: 3 Ways to Fall in Love with Every Moment

A great life after abuse. It kinda sounds like a foreign concept, doesn’t it? What does life even mean after you been attacked and harmed by another human being?  I get it. My life is not the same as it would have been if I had never been abused. In fact, part of life after abuse is facing that grief. Even more so, it's that wish that we had a different life. But, despite the pain you went...

Here’s How to Want Tomorrow to Come When Life is Hard

Was today exhausting? Like the idea of waking up for tomorrow sounds like the most challenging thing to do? I mean who wants to get up for tomorrow that might be just as bad as today? I doubt any person would say “I do” to that.  But the thing is, us survivors of abuse don't have a choice. We have to wake up for tomorrow, even though it still carries the pain of our past trauma.  If we don't...

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