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How to stop feeling like a burden after abuse

How to Stop Feeling Like a Burden After Abuse

Feeling like a burden is normal when we’re disabled survivors of abuse. People tend to make huge issues about the accommodations we need. They shame us for still “holding on to our past.” And so so much more. This is all unfair. It’s ableism. But it doesn’t stop us from feeling like a burden—even when we know that society’s idea of us is wrong. Life after abuse is difficult and it has left us with valid...

It's healing to accept Your Life is Unfair

It’s Healing to Accept Your Life is Unfair

You were completely innocent. You did not deserve the abuse, you did not deserve the pain that you now hold. Your life is unfair—at least, it feels that way. And this is valid. Abuse wasn’t some positive life lesson you were destined to experience. But, when your life is unfair, how do you reclaim happiness anyways? How do you find joy after abuse? It’s through powerful validation and acceptance. When you hear that it’s okay...

Sabotaging relationships? This is How to Find Peace in Love

Sabotaging relationships? This is How to Find Peace in Love

Do you ever start to love someone too much, then get scared and push them away? Sabotaging relationships like this is super common for us survivors. And, unfortunately, we end up losing some of our closest relationships because of this. Why do we push away love—something we want so much? Because abuse made love scary. Uncertain. All you’re trying to do is protect yourself from more pain. And the way we do this is through...

Everything You Need to Know About Boundaries in Relationships

Everything You Need to Know About Boundaries in Relationships

Boundaries in relationships are notoriously difficult for us survivors of abuse. What if setting a boundary ruins our relationship? What is the difference between a boundary and just a desire…a want? Because of past abuse, setting boundaries in relationships seems unsafe and intimidating. After all, sometimes our abusers hurt us more when we tried to set a boundary. When you have strong boundaries, you will find deep emotional connections, safe relationships, and empowered empathy with others....

Dissociative Amnesia: What to Do When Life is Only Partially Lived

Dissociative Amnesia: What to Do When Life is Only Partially Lived

Life is lived in the moment. This is the most important truth for us survivors of abuse—especially those of us with dissociative amnesia. This condition causes us to forget a lot of things. Sometimes it’s just traumatic memories. At other times, amnesia can spread to even everyday things. Ranging from why we walked into a certain room to forgetting entire friendships. No human remembers everything, but those of us with dissociative amnesia witness the power...

Overcome a Lack of Motivation to Recover

Overcome a Lack of Motivation to Recover

Recovery is hard. Trauma is a daily battle for us survivors of abuse. Each fight is not an easy one. It’s completely natural to have a lack of motivation. In fact, as Mike Bundrant of the iNLP Center states, it's common for just about everyone to lack motivation at one point or another.  You’ve fought hard. You have stood your ground in every battle and you’ve come out victorious. You’re still here and that’s what truly matters. But...

3 Fantastic techniques to improve your mental health

3 Fantastic Techniques to Improve Your Mental Health

You are not taking a step back in your recovery when PTSD comes back. When memories of abuse resurface. Truthfully, you can always improve your mental health even in the midst of the tough emotions of trauma recovery. The work you have been doing is still in play, even when it feels like you fell backwards. You’re always moving forwards—a part of moving forwards is letting your past come up so it can be healed....

Why your emotional strength is unstoppable

Why Your Emotional Strength is Unstoppable

You are so strong, whether you are happy or traumatized. Your emotional strength is unshakeable. You’ve survived so much and, even though this recovery is hard, I know you can survive it too. This entire video is a message about your infinite strength. It’s to inspire and uplift you, especially when you’re feeling weak or broken down. Emotional strength is not something that is only sometimes present. It isn’t defined by being able to force...

Conquer guilt and shame after abuse

Conquer Guilt and Shame After Abuse

Have you ever been hanging out with friends and your mind says, “why do they even want to spend time with me?” Or doubted that you’re worthy of love? This is all due to guilt and shame, the kind that hurts and harms us survivors nearly every day. How do you overcome guilt and shame? How do you see yourself in a loving light? First, you have to understand what they are. Guilt and shame are...

The most empowering quote for survivors of abuse

The Most Empowering Quote for Survivors of Abuse

Your trauma impacted you, but it does not shape your entire life. You can still live your dreams—even if it feels like it seriously damaged you. You are stronger than ever. This empowering quote from Maya Angelou proves that. “You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can choose not to be reduced by them.” We didn’t control our abusers. They hurt us and we couldn’t stop them. We felt powerless—we possibly...

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