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You are Capable of Finding Joy After Abuse—Here’s How to Start

You are Capable of Finding Joy After Abuse—Here’s How to Start

Does past abuse ruin our chances of living a good life (let alone finding joy)? My vision of a “best life” was essentially being okay with waking up each day. No longer wanting to give up. Surviving. I didn’t think any more than that was possible. That sounded like the best I could have in life…and I’ve discovered many other survivors feel this way too. We guess we can get to an okay life—but don’t believe...

How to make your relationships last a lifetime: 2 keys to good communication

How to Make Your Relationships Last a Lifetime: 2 Keys to Good Communication

We all know good communication is important in our relationships. We know we’re supposed to talk to those we love, not keep secrets, and mutually respect one another.  But what about when we have an uncomfortable boundary to set with someone we care about?  What if we have a need that contradicts someone else’s need? (What they need is also valid.) Or how do we keep relationships healthy if we’re good with communication…but the other person isn’t?  That’s what...

How to make every decision with self confidence

How to Make Every Decision with Self Confidence

You’ll have self confidence if you believe in the decisions you make.  Making decisions you believe in means trusting you followed your heart and did what was truly best for yourself. If you’re certain you did the best thing we possibly could at the time, then you’ll feel strong and self-loving even if something doesn’t work out.  That’s ideal—to trust ourselves every time we make a choice. Imagine being able to go on a date and know you...

Tough times? How to get through it all (lovingly)

Tough Times? How to Get Through it All (Lovingly)

Hardship happens to us all. Sometimes it’s predictable, sometimes it’s unexpected. That tends to be the most painful—when tough times catch us off guard. Why can’t things just be easy for once? After all you’ve been through, you deserve peace, not more struggle. You’ll learn how to ease your way through unexpected challenges much better. This makes life easier, even though tough stuff will still happen from time to time. Instead of being stressed for weeks, you may...

The Shame-Free Way to Leave Unhealthy Relationships

It’s hard to walk away from unhealthy relationships the instant a warning sign pops up. Us survivors will often tell ourselves “I’ll never let anyone do this to me again,” but when it comes time to actually walk away…we hesitate anyways.  Why? Because after a life with so little love, we want every bit we can get. Even if the person providing it isn’t all that good for us.  I talked about how us survivors tend to...

The Direct Path You Need to Follow to Thrive after Abuse

We all enjoy dreaming of a better life. One where we thrive after abuse—less PTSD, stable finances, happier relationships. Whatever that dream is for you.  We have to dream to stay hopeful, but we often try to reach our ideal life without taking some important healing steps first. Without this foundation, even the best goals and opportunities will (most likely) collapse around us. Everyone healing from abuse has to go through the same (or at least an...

The Most Compassionate Way of Dealing with Anger

The Most Compassionate Way of Dealing with Anger

Anger can be explosive, lashing out at anyone we care about—innocent or not. Or it can stay buried, festering into self-hatred or self-harm. Or maybe we reject the protective side of anger, letting people walk over us. Dealing with anger, no matter how it shows in your life, can seem nearly impossible. But there are healthy and beautiful ways to handle this emotion. It’s simply about finding your anger’s unique voice and expression. I thought, for...

Overcome Self Doubt with these 25 Confidence Affirmations

Overcome Self Doubt with these 25 Confidence Affirmations

Wish you could believe in yourself, even in the face of criticism or doubt from others? Feeling hesitant about your decisions is normal after abuse. Your abuser had total control for a long time. It's logical that confidence is hard to find after the attacks you faced.  This list of 25 confidence affirmations can get you to a place of self-empowerment, even after your trauma. The impact it has on your life won’t stop you from becoming...

How to Conquer Your Fear of Doctors after Abuse

How to Conquer Your Fear of Doctors after Abuse

It’s pretty common for survivors of abuse to have a fear of doctors. Anxiety during certain procedures, like injections, gynecology, or more invasive examinations is definitely not unheard of either. In fact, several people asked me to write about this topic. I’ve faced and (in a lot of ways) overcome this fear—so I knew it would be an important blog to create. Although I no longer have panic attacks at the idea of seeing a doctor, I...

4 Steps to Overcome Limiting Beliefs after Abuse

4 Steps to Overcome Limiting Beliefs after Abuse

Trauma leaves us with a bunch of limiting beliefs. These are subconscious patterns that inform how we see ourselves and the world. Things we believe.  Beliefs themselves aren’t bad, many are neutral or good. But some are damaging. They hold us back—limiting us. These, logically, are called limiting beliefs.  Every single person, with a history of trauma or not, has limiting beliefs. But, as survivors of abuse, ours are often more impactful than your average person who’s...

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