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Thoughts: Not All Wounds Can Be “Healed”

We need to go beyond the phrase “time heals all wounds” (like I’ve been seeing all over my feed)…and we ✨also✨ need to move beyond “all wounds can be healed.”

Some emotional pain may be chronic and, honestly, that’s okay.

The weight of what you went through may not have an ending destination. It may not be something that can completely disappear or be wrapped up.

This might be challenging to hear at first, but if we explore it, it can be quite liberating.

What if we release the pressure to heal our pain…and instead lovingly accept it? It’s there in us, and the constant push to healing can quickly slip into a game of rejecting our hurt.

I like to think of my pain like a big volcano that I’m standing on the edge of. It’s huge—honestly, it’s larger than me. And yet it’s also marvelous and beautiful when I look at it. Terrifying and overwhelming too.

Our wounds aren’t flaws. They aren’t things to reject and push away. They are there, resting in us. Sometimes it’s explosive, sometimes it’s calm.

But this huge volcano is something I recognize I will not be able to make vanish in this lifetime (vanishing=healing, that’s a common message). It’s simply too big. Years of being enslaved and victimized as a child created too large of a pool of hurt for me, as one person, to remedy (especially while still under systems of oppression that perpetuate more hurt).

So, instead of trying to push to erase or shrink this pain, I’m letting it be marvelous and terrifying. I’m letting it be an eternal wound—one that carries weight and shows my strength. One that needs gentle attention and care and acceptance.

Instead of working to erase this healing, I’m working to live alongside it.

💗 Does this resonate with you?

💜 Does your pain feel like it can vanish, or do you feel your wound is eternal or chronic?

💙 How does this new perspective feel for you?

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February 11, 2021