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How to have an easier life with this one problem solving skill

How to Have an Easier Life With This One Problem Solving Skill

Feel like the problems you face are never-ending? Like you’re struggling to solve them before new ones come up.  Us survivors of abuse often face a greater challenge with life’s ups and downs, since we didn’t learn effective problem solving skills as children (we were too focused on our basic survival).  Yet, you were able to get through the trauma you faced, so you have the strength to solve literally any obstacle that comes your way. You...

What you need to stop feeling discouraged (even after years of abuse recovery)

What You Need to Stop Feeling Discouraged (Even After Years of Abuse Recovery)

If you’re a survivor of abuse who’s been working for years (or even decades) to heal and you feel discouraged because you haven’t made much progress, this blog is for you.  We all know it’s a journey to heal from abuse, especially if you were hurt in childhood. Your entire formative years were created around painful, traumatic experiences—and changing how this affected you isn’t going to happen overnight.  But, after the years of work you’ve put in,...

Struggling in a new relationship? How to overcome the fear of betrayal.

Struggling in a New Relationship? How to Overcome the Fear of Betrayal

Terrified those you love are going to let you down? Or that they’ll abandon or hurt you? You’re not the only survivor with this fear of betrayal—most of us have struggled with it after abuse. Relationships are nerve-wracking even for someone who’s never been traumatized. It’s human nature to want to be loved and, when we get close to someone, we want to keep them by us.  And, our history has given us a bad impression of...

Why you have a scarcity mindset after abuse and how to heal it, title image on background of purple flower field

Why You Have a Scarcity Mindset After Abuse (& How to Heal It)

It’s super common for us survivors of abuse to have a scarcity mindset. That’s when we constantly feel like we’re struggling to have what we need to survive, usually not enough money. Abuse impacts us in many ways, and sometimes that means leaving us in poverty. Depending on where you live and what resources you have available to you, being poor can be a real threat to your survival.  You need food, shelter, and medical care to...

Lost all your friends to victim blaming? Here's how to handle it

Lost All Your Friends to Victim Blaming? Here’s How to Handle It

Victim blaming can be as traumatic as the initial abuse, especially when all of your friends leave—blaming you for what happened and shaming you for sharing your story.  This shame, right after we make the courageous move to leave our abusers, can be extremely detrimental to our healing. In some cases the victim blaming can be so severe it convinces the victim to return to their abuser.  In this blog, I’ll debunk the mystery of why people...

2 Tips on How to Thrive When You’re Living the “Single Life”

Stuck living the single life, at least for the time being? It can be tough, especially since us survivors of abuse often crave love. And we can find a lot of healing with a partner who respects us, too! That adds to our desire to live the “partnered life” instead.  Not to mention the loneliness that can hit when we live on our own, without someone to cuddle and kiss and share hardships with.  Love is an...

The Love Letter Your Inner Child Needs After Abuse

Your inner child needs a lot of love after all you’ve been through. The abuse you faced when you were younger (and perhaps older too) was unfair and unjust. I know how heavily it weighs on you.  Your inner child, the part of you longing for the love you never got, is hurting with that same pain. So, today, it’s time to share unconditional love with this part of you. This blog is formatted like a letter....

What is joy + how to fill your life with it after abuse

What is Joy? (+ How to Fill Your Life with it after Abuse)

What is joy? And more importantly, what the heck does it look like after abuse?  Is it something us survivors can even have (because, let’s face it, we face pain on the daily)? I’m a huge advocate of living a joyous life—and I fully believe, with every bone in my body, that you can live a life of joy. You can have the career and relationship you want, you can wake up feeling excited for the day,...

How to make your relationships last a lifetime: 2 keys to good communication

How to Make Your Relationships Last a Lifetime: 2 Keys to Good Communication

We all know good communication is important in our relationships. We know we’re supposed to talk to those we love, not keep secrets, and mutually respect one another.  But what about when we have an uncomfortable boundary to set with someone we care about?  What if we have a need that contradicts someone else’s need? (What they need is also valid.) Or how do we keep relationships healthy if we’re good with communication…but the other person isn’t?  That’s what...

6 Powerful techniques that can stop a panic attack

6 Powerful Techniques that Can Stop a Panic Attack

Imagine if you could instantly stop a panic attack. As wonderful as that would be, it’s not something I can teach—but this blog will show you the next best thing. A list of techniques to quickly lower fear, panic, and anxiety.  Even if they don’t totally stop a panic attack, they’re worth trying. Reducing your anxiety even a little will help. (P.S. I’m not a licensed therapist. The techniques in this blog are not intended to treat...

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